Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Paul Ball 16 Years (Long Post)



Yesterday somebody at work complimented me on how fast I can type. It's a secret pride that I have that I'm a fast typer so I was really happy when he said it. I was especially happy to tell him that my dad gave me a little red electronic typewriter when I was 6 or 7 and told me to learn how to type. After explaining to him how I learned how to type it dawned on me that it was the 4th, just 2 days away.

I'm writing this on the 5th because I know I won't have time tomorrow to write it, but my dad passed away 16 years ago on February 6th, 1992. It was a Thursday. Most years I usually notice a week or so after that the 6th had already passed, but this time around it's a little different (I'll get to that later).

Aside from family, nearly everyone with whom I interact in life never knew my father, including Rachel. It's weird to think that the most important person in my life never met another important person in my life. What's even more sad, I just scoured my house and realized I don't even have a picture of him in my house. I'll head over to my mom's and take a picture of a picture to post on the blog here with this post (obviously no digi shots from '92).

So for those of you who don't know (which is pretty much anybody reading this), let me introduce you to Paul Richard Ball. Born August 8th, 1957, graduated from Olympus High School, served his mission in Taiwan, married the woman his mother picked out for him, worked for Mountain America Credit Union (still a scholarship in his name available there), and passed away at the age of 34 in a diabetes related accident. Only about 5'8'', 160-170 lbs. so I obviously didn't inherit his physical qualities. I'm not sure what personality qualities I inherited either. My mom says I have his stubborness, which of course I'm prone to disagree with :). I'm not an introvert, but I'm certainly not the outgoing friendly guy my dad was. The mortuary director told my mom he'd never had so many people come to a viewing. My dad had a way of making you feel like you were his best friend every time he talked to you no matter who you were. I've only met a few people like that in my life: Mike Davis (one of my best friends anyways), Jim Alvord (my next door neighbor), and Scott Osmond (a mission buddy). As much as I want my dad's friendly personality, people who meet me always seem to tell me after a couple weeks, "You know, when I first met you, you looked like you were angry and mean, but you're actually quite a nice guy." Thanks for the backhanded compliment! Last but not least, my dad was handy; pretty much all the Ball-men are handy to some extent. Not me, Rachel can usually figure out how to fix something before I can. Oh well, I'm pretty I have some Ball-traits but I'll just have to find out what they are in the afterlife.

Two interesting tidbits about school that I find hilarious. He got his undergrad from the U and his Masters from BYU. Undergrad is where your heart is and I always thought it was the reverse, so I was determined from pretty much 10 years of age (my age when he passed) that I would attend BYU. When I was about 23 I found out that he actually did his undergrad at the U and that he was more of a U fan than a BYU fan. Well, I was in too deep at the Y as a student and as a fan to ever change then, but it's interesting to think how life would have been different in that respect. Second was that his major was Communications. I'll put in a quick caveat that no college degree is worthless but I will admit that me and many other friends have often made fun of those majoring in Communications because it usually meant you didn't know what you wanted to do so you just did that. Again, around 23 I find myself staring at his degree in Communications and I had to laugh.

When I think about my dad I usually think about how cool it would be to explain to him all the incredible technological advancements of today. He was in to computers and shortly before he died he paid something like $3,000 to buy a top-of-the-line "laptop" computer. As recently as a few years ago my mom still had it in her possession (she's since thrown it out, sadly) and let me just say it was the most pathetic looking machine I've ever laid eyes on. This is stupid to write but I imagine myself explaining to him what the internet is, how common cell phones are (they were the brick size when he died and cost like $3/minute), how nobody knows what a DOS system is anymore, and how amazing digital cameras/videos are (he loved taking pictures and making home videos). It's such a different world today it blows my mind to think about.

My dad was only 34 when he passed, and as I approach that age I absolutely cannot believe how young it is (lookout when I actually turn 34, I think I'll pass that entire year in shock). I sit in awe of my mother who had 4 young kids and was 7 months pregnant with Casey when it happened. A few years ago she told me, "I would always think, 'What is life going to be like 10-15 years from now?' and here we are. " Now we've essentially started the same progression with the passing of Kim over a year ago. She made some incredible financial decisions and we've all made it through the 16 years and counting. I see other people who are in their early 30's, still really just getting their career into a solid state, raising young families, crazy. Anybody I meet that's in their early 30's makes me think of my dad and how young he was.

I mentioned at the top that this year is different. This year I have a son of my own. I was never shy to announce that I wanted our first child to be a boy, and Heavenly Father granted that wish. I'm positive I wanted our first to be a boy because I wanted to reflect on how it is to have a father/son relationship. For any who don't know, Cannon is essentially named after my dad, who always joked that his middle name was Cannon. I am CONSTANTLY thinking about what my dad must have been thinking as he watched me grow as I watch Cannon day after day. I think all the time about stuff I want to do with him and teach him as he grows older. I want to have a fun relationship with him when he grows up. Last summer I went golfing with Tommy and his dad (which everyone knows they do together all the time) and I couldn't help but think that if my dad was still alive we'd have had the same type of relationship. He golfed every Saturday with his brother Dave, of course leaving me at home to wash the cars and mow the lawn. The $1/car injustice is not forgotten to this day! I have to laugh as I think about it, as I know I will make Cannon do some menial chore for $1 (Boom! My Ball-trait right there!).
-Brandon

7 comments:

The Lind's said...

Brandon,
I have to comment and say thanks for sharing that! What a sweet post! I am sure your dad is very proud of you! and your cute little family! Even as BYU fans! :) You are a strong person...I can't imagine losing my dad especially when you were so young. I also have always admired your mom. She is such a sweet person! Thanks again for sharing!
Becca

Brad said...

Great post Brandon... I remember that day so well... and you're absolutely right... 34 seems SO VERY YOUNG! I think about uncle Paul every now and then... what I remember best is his infectious laugh... and how he always liked to flip around the hood emblem on my Dad's car... it's a shame that most cars (except Jaguar) don't even have hood emblems anymore! By the way... the summer before he died... your Dad paid me $10/week to mow and trim that BEAST OF A LAWN... it seemed like it would take 4 hours every Saturday... As a 14 year old at the time... I totally felt like I was getting worked over.... someday when I meet uncle Paul again in heaven... I am going to request some child labor reparations... or perhaps I'll settle if he offer me that premium sleeping spot atop the Kingfisher II... assuming of course that Lake Powell is Heaven!

Jeff and Brandi said...

Baller,
Your pops sounds like a stud! I don't want to hear about you even considering being a Ute fan. Cannon is the coolest little guy I've ever seen and he's lucky to have you as a Dad. I got the love bro!
-Jeff

Heidi said...

That was really neat, Brandon... Thanks for sharing!

I've heard so much about your Dad over the years I feel like I "know" him. He is for sure someone I wish I could have known. :)

Eric and Cindy said...

It's hard to describe Paul without shedding a tear or two now. I was in Iceland on my mission when he died and it's hard to believe it has been that long. I will always remember how Paul had a sense of humor about most things. Whenever there was a joke to tell, we had to tell Paul. The neatest thing he told me before I left on my mission was the day I was set apart, he told me I would meet some of my best friends in the next few weeks in the MTC and in the mission field. I met my MTC companion the next day and we are great friends. After 2 weeks in Iceland, I met Cindy...my wife. She was an exchange student from Oregon. So...2 people I met on my mission turned out to be my best friends.

You have his traits...you have a love for the gospel and a love for your family...2 things Uncle Paul had a tremendous devotion for.

Clements Family said...

Brandon, Thanks for sharing that about your dad! That was so sweet!

kdance said...

I loved reading that. Thank you for sharing! You are a really great writer. Your dad sounds like an awesome guy.